ORIGINAL BLISS

911 Doesn't Care If You See A Deer in Your Neighborhood!

"Cotton Club"

Those of you who have read my profile - or actually know me in person - know that I am a 911/Police/Fire dispatcher by profession - artist by soulfession.

I just went back to my profession after a 28-day vacation. 

I was "done" day one.

After 3 hours in the Center I was cussing like a drunken sailor.

"What the f%*k is he doing?"

"Are you f%*@#ng kidding me!"

"Why are f%*@#n' people so f%*@#n' stupid!"

"Oh my f%*@#n' Buddha!".... 

....

I'm not proud.

I read somewhere recently that cussing relieves stress.

Yes. I am making excuses...  But here are some sources. And here. And here.

I'm sorry --- you can't have a man pull a gun on a bartender because said bartender refuses to serve him another drink...

have your partner listen to a man in his thirties take his last breath on the phone...

send officers to search the city for someone with a knife threatening to kill himself...

then take a 911 call from a dumbass who saw a deer walk across a street...

and not let out a few "fucks".

Sorry.

"Fucks" happen.

I wish I could say we handle more emergencies then stupid shit.

We don't.

"Someone knocked on my door. I don't know them."

"I saw two glowing eyes under a car. It's too big to be a cat. I think it is a fox."

"The kids across the street are playing basketball. Could you have an officer tell them to stop? The thumping is driving me crazy."

"I lost my grocery receipt."

These a but a few samples from THIS PAST 4 DAYS!

No. I am not kidding.

I spend my nights talking to my co-workers about our "Sons of Anarchy", "Glee", "Mad Men", "So You Think You Can Dance", "Fringe", and "Big Brother" addictions, doodling in my moleskine when there is peace on my part of Earth and talking to stupid people.

I get paid for the two times a night I actually save someone's ass.

It is my belief that if the whole shift was full of life saving, my stress level would be good.

It's the stupid that is stressful.

"Tattoo"

"Totally Random Sharpie Doodle Rant"

(Today's doodles courtesy of peace on Earth in the wee hours of the morning and my blessed lunch break - when I get one! "Cotton Club" is layered in Photoshop over Nasos3's Texture 72 for Flickr's Textures 4 Layers group.)

Namaste,

C H E Z

Playing to My Weaknesses

Jeff and I went out for a long stroll last night, taking the 5 mile route rather than the 3 mile route.

As we were passing a neighbors house we heard the distinctive clank of a horseshoe hitting a stake - the ring of the not-quite-a-ringer.

We started talking about horseshoes.

We talked about bowling.

and darts.

and golf.

As I thought about these games and my skills at them, I realized that I'm not naturally good at them.

When I bowl, my arm swings inward, not straight, so the ball hooks to the left.

I understand this about my bowling so when I play, I utilize this knowledge about my weakness. I move to the right a bit and aim 2 lane arrows to the right, so my ball hooks right into the sweet spot.

(DISCLAIMER: I am not a good bowler until I've had a couple of beers in a dirty bowling alley glass. My second game is always my best (130) and after that I'm tipsy and I suck again.)

It's the same with darts. I understand how I throw, so I adjust my aim.

Some people would call this overcompensating. I call it modifying my game.

I started wondering if I could utilize this in other areas of my life; understand my weaknesses, adjust my aim, modify my game.

For instance,

I am a control freak.

Seriously!

I understand that it started at a very, very young age, and it has to do with a lack of trust. It's all very valid, but I have applied it to everything and everyone, even though they have proved themselves capable and trust-worthy.

It drives them nuts.

I understand this about myself. So now, how can I play to that weakness?

I have a vacation coming up and Jeff and I are taking a road trip to Colorado to visit my sister. Yes, a road trip.

I am a terrible - HORRIBLE - side-seat driver. Using my new theory, I am going to attempt to modify my game and not give constant feedback on the status of Jeff's driving skills.

I'll let you know how that works out! (Actually... I'll let Jeff let you know how it works out. I figure if we don't end up in County... we're good!  ;-)   )  

Namaste,

C H E Z

Whispers in the Wind

Ear to the ground

Listening for whispers in the wind.

Ethereal answers

but all I hear is a great hum.

Maybe I'm not listening in the right direction.

 

 

"Elizabeth Imagined"

The next few weeks are going to be tough. Kelsea turns 18 on Tuesday and is heading off to college and into the big, bad world. Why is it I feel that the world is a smaller, but badder place than when I turned 18? Is it just my imagination? A mama's exaggerated worry? Or is it true?

The world is definitely smaller now.

When I turned 18 and headed off to Japan alone, and then the Air Force, the world seemed large and foreign with every mile you moved further from home.

Then MTV hit the air. Yes, I blame it on MTV. You could actually watch the whole world dancing to the same music, and the Earth shrunk.

THEN! Al Gore created the Internet! And a World Wide Web was cast and tied us all together and my "friends" and "followers" from thousands of miles across the globe feel like neighbors across the street.

But at the same time, the world grew meaner. And crimes called car jackings, home invasion robberies, suicide bombings, and active shooters in colleges and high schools began occurring. We created the Amber Alert when our children started being abducted by strangers off the street.

Is it my imagination? Or was it always this way and we were just dumb and un"informed"?

So I am going through growing pains and experiencing a mother's anxiety; burning sage, offering sacrifices to the gods and drinking wine.

I know I will feel foolish in a month... after she's off and running and everything is fine.

It's the waiting and anticipation that fuels my fears.

Namaste,

C H E Z

(The drawing above was done in the early morning hours between 911 calls. She looks like my youngest daughter Elizabeth when she turns 18. She is 7 now. And I am already worrying. ;-))

Nothing to Lose

Nothing to hide now.

Nothing to gain from.

Honesty.

Truth.

Integrity.

Unblemished.

Raw,

Naked.

Real.

Fresh.

Nothing 2 lose.

Namaste,

C H E Z

Making Do From Scratch

 

"Making Do From Scratch"

I was sitting at work in the middle of the night. After everybody falls asleep and no one is moving on the streets, there is finally peace.

The only thing I had access to were cooking magazines. All the smut reading had disappeared (Smut being People, In Touch and OK!) It was ALL gone! Maybe the powers that be think it is inappropriate reading material?

Cooking magazines are my least favorite collage fodder. But it's what I had. That and a book with sea creature drawings. So "Making Do From Scratch" was created.

I love it!

Art has a way of teaching us life lessons. I learned that we may not have all the exact tools we would like for creating the life we want... but we CAN make the life we want with what we already have.

Here's to the wisdom of ART!

On our one day getaway, Jeff found a large format, hard cover moleskine! It is now my journal of the week. It has the same smooth, creamy paper, yet the art created in it is better protected by its shell! Behold, page 1! I call her "Mary Annette"

 

"Mary Annette"

I covered the background in tea and coffee, let it dry, then smudged it with Wite-Out. For extra "texture" I used the Wite-Out roller tape. Then I sketched her and added pink accents with a watercolor pencil. This is a different style for me. I like her gritty innocence. 

And it wouldn't be a journal of mine if it didn't have a "To Do" list.

Off to work!

Namaste,

C H E Z