ORIGINAL BLISS

Driven to Distraction

I have been in denial the past few months. But more than one dear friend has mentioned it to me recently and I had to finally own up to the fact. I have been completely distracted.

Not a whole lot of writing for book 2 has been getting done. It's plotted, and three chapters are complete, but I have not been consistant with my daily writing as I should be. There is a lot of guilt and pressure associated with failing to meet my daily goals. And to avoid feeling bad about it, I avoid writing some more.

It all started when I published Dream Walker. After being cooped up in the corner alone for over a year, the thrill of getting out there, the rush of marketing and promoting the book, was invigorating. Ahhh... PEOPLE again.

Then came my birthday, and the Spring. The sunshine, the opportunities to hit the road, to see new landscapes, and to meet MORE people, was too tempting. And I embraced it. 

The final distraction came in the form of one person in particular. In the midst of meeting all these interesting, wonderful and inspiring people, one stood out. And it caught me off guard. I wasn't expecting it at all. But again, I went with it, got caught up in the flow of what the Universe had brought into my life. I took advantage a hike at the river, a concert road trip, saving kittens and the general hanging out.

In the back of my mind I questioned whether it is good for me -- if I am not meeting my goals -- if I am feeling sidetracked.

This morning, I was lounging in the bath contemplating it all and my Muse showed up. For those who haven't met Muse, he's what many would call an imaginary friend. I say he is real, he just isn't manifested fully in the 3D. Anyway, he lets me vent all this, lament my guilt about not being further along in Time Walker and emotionally vomit all over his cloak.

He was not fazed in the least. 

"You can't write about life, if you don't live it."

"If you were locked in your room writing Time Walker, you wouldn't have seen that dirty moon with a chunk of its head missing. You wouldn't have noticed how it looked hungover and grumpy after taking on too much Cinco de Mayo." 

"If you were staring at your computer, channeling disincarnate characters to the page, you would have missed that one REAL touch across your back and that kiss on your neck that stopped your breath and made you shiver."

"You have been emotionaly flatlined for too long. All those confused thoughts and intense feelings roiling in your mind and heart are a gift; a palette of vibrant color and flavor for you to paint with later. Savor it. Know it. Understand it. Then translate it to the page so others can see themself in the picture you paint with words."

"Roll around in the petri dish of life, absorb it all, because it is ALL SO FLEETING. Then put it in your writing so it can be immortal."

 

"And yes. It is good for you."

That's what Muse said.

Maybe he is right. Maybe distraction is part of the process, a fountian of unlimited inspiration, and I should not resist it so much. The writing will come, birthed organically and naturally from the furtile ground of experience, not forged from a dislocated idea and mere vocabulary.

So I am going to enjoy the fleeting things. Like taking this hot cup of coffee to my patio, letting the sun warm my skin and watching the trumpet vine bloom.

Namaste, 

Shannan

Embracing My Multiple Personalities!

 

Hey Original Bliss readers!

I had an epiphany this week.

I had planned to start a completely new blog devoted to everything that I do. My writing adventures and my musings on life and my art were to all be over at shannansinclair.com. I would transfer everything there, just like moving from one house to another.

But this week I realized something. I have a lot to say about many, many things.

For instance, I have a blog post brewing about our bodies being our clocks. It is very insightful and made me laugh when I thought about it, which is a sign that it is funny. But it may reference poop, or periods, or the dreaded MENOPAUSE!

And when I thought about putting THAT post on the NEW site, it didn't resonate. It felt off.

That blog is about one part of my personality, and a "business" space for my books - of which there will be MANY and make me RICH! ***Bwahahahaha!*** That site is not for my ranting about kids, and people, and random shit in my mind. In fact, I question whether the word "shit" should even appear on that site.

But I have an alter ego that has an insatiable NEED to keep it real. She says, "fuck you!" to professionalism and making money... it's about authenticity! It's about your truth!

So I decided - I need really two blogs. Either that OR professional help for my split personality.

I am starting with the former to see how that goes, which means that Original Bliss will remain a part of the Blogoverse, that I will be embracing my split, possibly multiple personalities and giving myself triple the amount of writing to do.

Great.

;-)

Namaste,

C H E Z

First Peek: Dream Walker

Now that the dust has settled in my life, I am back to REALLY finishing my book. The climax and finale chapters are underway as you read this post.

 

Because I am planning to e-publish it - to generate interest - while I search for an agent/publisher, I have also started planning my marketing strategies, designing covers and preparing a web site. 

This whole novel writing endeavor is arduous. Although the idea for the novel came to me almost 7 years ago, I didn't begin truly gestating it until November 1st of last year. By the time I finish, I will have carried this puppy for 9 months. I am fascinated at how the process is almost exactly like being pregnant with children. 

The uncontrollable eating.

The unbearable anxiety.

The sleepless nights.

The heartburn.

The hemorrhoids.

I can't wait for the damn thing to crown!

My beta readers and I have narrowed the book cover design down to the final two choices. I wanted to give all of you a sneak peek and an opportunity to have a say in which one you like the best. It has basically come down to the font.

Dream Walker is a quantum fiction novel about a young woman who unwittingly stumbles into another dimension and witnesses a murder. What she believed was only a dream, she soon discovers is a reality, and she finds herself in danger of being hunted and eliminated by the people in control of The Stratum.

Please leave a comment as to which cover you prefer! Soon, I will be posting some sample chapters to whet your appetite as well!!!!! Fun! Fun!

Namaste,

C H E Z

Book Cover Photo  ©DepositPhotos / Stanislav Perov

Catching Up with My Heartbeat

"Inside the Hi Dive"

 

I left my heart in San Francisco the day I got my drivers license and hit the highway in my canary yellow, 1974 Dodge Colt named Tweety.

I drove there from my then little country town, Modesto, as often as I could. I drive there from the same town, now grow'd up into the epitomy of urban sprawl, as often as I can.

The book which I am so diligently writing takes place in San Francisco and the Central Valley (shhhh.... I am breaking my "don't talk about the project" rule.) I had some other business in the city and decided to tack on a "research"/"anniversary" trip with my husband... not that I need the excuse but excuses do make one feel better, especially when you are spending money. 

 

Our first recreational stop of the day was the Hi Dive Bar situated right next to Pier 28 and practically under the Bay Bridge. I have passed this bar every, single time I drive down the Embarcadaro and have always wanted to have a Bloody Mary here. I finally got my wish. A Bloody Mary with a side of lobster bisque that was abundant with huge chunks of lobster! Jeff was lucky to get 2 bites. I hogged it all up!

 

This will be an every, single time stop from now on. It was everything I could hope for in a "dive" bar on the Bay.

 

Of course, I have to also have my oysters!!!!!! So we walked to the Ferry Building and partook of these perfect food specimens.

 

"Waiting for Me Oysters!"

We also had to try what has been touted as "the world's perfect cup of coffee". I must say, Blue Bottle Coffee did make the smoothest cup of joe I have ever tasted!

 

 

 

We wandered back to the car taking in the clear air, and the near empty streets. If you want to see San Francisco, go in January. The weather is perfect and the tourists are GONE!

 

We checked into our hotel, the Intercontinental Mark Hopkins. Our room overlooked Nob Hill, the Fairmont Hotel, Grace Cathedral, the Illuminati hang out - The Pacific Union Club, and the entire city.

I had to get inside the Cathedral during sunset.

 

 

 

The Cathedral was glorious... but I found a few things odd. First, the door panel artwork, replicas of Lorenzo Ghiberti's 15th century masterpiece depicted various scenes from the Bible that struck me as strange.

 

Note the angel passing through a portal doorway on the right. And the heavenly host in the sky looking like a UFO.

 

Again with the UFO's.... hovering all around the Great Pyramid.... (up close they are angels).

 

God giving Moses the 10 Commandments.... from a UFO!

Really now??... very interesting.

 

Even more interesting is that the Cathedral sits across the street from the Masonic Lodge, and the highly elite Pacific Union Club. Jeff tried to get in but we were very denied.

 

"View from Room 1226"

We went back to the hotel, then went to the Top of the Mark to enjoy martinis and the city lights!

 

The next day we were up early for more traipsing.  We went out to wander amoung the urban ruins of the Sutro Baths. 

 

Before

 

Today

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My main goal in all this was looking for my main characters' homes. Exploring their neighborhoods, getting a feel for their lives in the city. The Presidio is amazing. I have driven through it many times and I went to a wine tasting at the Officer's Club once, but I have never walked through the neighborhoods. If you are ever in SF, be sure to do this sometime.

 

 

 

 

Before heading over to my sister's for dinner, we made a quick stop at the Mountain View Cemetery in Piedmont. I need to go back and take the tour. I have a thing for cemetaries. Is that weird?  The architecture of the elaborate mausoleams, the age showing on the angels faces, the peace of the gardens and the fountains. I especially like to read about the departed on their headstones. I feel their stories, touch their history and make it my own. Must be the storyteller in me.

 

 

 

It is time for me to mosey into my office and write my next chapter.

While comtemplating my book walking along the Embarcado, the sidewalk told me it was my destiny.

 

And when a sidewalk tells you so, it must be true!

Namaste,

C H E Z

 

Hello Blog....

Favorite Thing #31: Found Margin Notes from Strangers in Library Books

Hello blog....

You may be feeling neglected, lately, but I have been saving all my beans for my book. Believe me, my mind has wandered to you often and I have had to restrain myself.

Blogging, while rewarding, is a tool of procrastination for me. Unlike watching mindless, smut television, blogging comes with less guilt. At least I am writing something, right? But it is procrastination none the less.

A little procrastination can be a good thing.

Let's call it space.

When I get to spot in my narrative that clogs my synapses, when I can't make a clear choice in direction, when I need time to play out the scene or dialog in my head, a sweet diversion is a good thing.

A bath. Cooking some dinner. Blogging. Taking a walk or a Zumba class. All good space makers. My favorite, by far is the NAP! I take the clogged noggin' to the pillow and miraculous things have been known to happen. Answers magically weave through my consciousness. The roto-rooter of creativity is the nap!

Okay... back to the page. I have a goal of completing this chapter and starting the next before Thanksgiving!

P.S. Chopped my hair off. Unlike Sampson, it gave me strength.... and gave me 15 minutes more writing time!

Namaste,

C H E Z

The Up/Down, Roundy Round

Rather than reaching for the up or striving for the high...

maybe we should be trying to find neutral.

The Buddha and the Christ say, "No duh, Shannan."

 

 

I never said I was a fast learner.

Namaste,

C H E Z

 

Where for art thou, ART?

I have yet to figure out the ways of creativity or how it flows through me. I am often at a loss.

I have evolved and transitioned in my passions over the years.

At one time in my life, performing was my passion. I craved the theatre, immersing myself in character and story and taking the audience there with me.

Then... it was nothing but song, to channel the rapture of music with my voice.

Another shift ~ and I was channeling poetry. I couldn't focus for all the verses dancing in my head.

And then ~ my soul journals, sixteen thus far! Hundreds of pages filled with colorful visions!

Once consumed by a passion, the former one loses its hold. I cannot believe I ever gave up the theatre. I loved it so much. It was my life! But I have no craving for it now.

The singing! I was sure I wanted to do it forever, but when watching Mattea sing, I wonder where my envy is.

My obsession for my journaling was a serious addiction. I could not go a day without paint on my fingers. Lately, I find myself going several without withdrawals ever setting in.

I am unsettled by this. I feel like I am letting something go that I once loved so much. But it isn't feeding me the same way anymore. It is like saying to a lover, "I love you, but I am not IN LOVE with you."

Yet I still feel creativity roiling within me seeking expression.

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of watching Anthony Bourdain's "No Reservations", Rome episode. I was overcome with a craving for Italy! A sudden, ravanous desire to create a pasta perfection called Cacio e Pepe! I want to savor a freshly cut wheel of parmesan cheese while I sip red wine!

I realized that there is art in everything!

I could be an artful cook and create that pasta!

I can be an artful traveler and immerse myself in another culture!

I have been devouring books lately. I have 10 books that I am concurrently reading right now. No lie! I am being an artful reader!

As I study and write for my Holistic Theology degree, I am an artful student.

I was an artful mother the days I spent with my daughter in San Francisco.

I am an artful blogger when I craft these little posts.

When I crawl into bed, luxuriate in my sheets, snuggle into my pillow, and find my husbands feet, I am an artful dreamer.

At any time, when we are fully engaged in crafting the living of our lives...

we are artists!

Namaste,

C H E Z

Dreaming on the Page - Reduced Price!

When the deepest part of yourself has something to tell you, how do you hear it?

Soul journals are a sacred space to throw your inner workings, your dreams, fears, laughter, tears, plans, reflections, obsessions, should ofs, could ofs, have-tos and to-dos.

It is a place to give yourself complete permission to make a mess and get it wrong.

This is a self-published zine/workshop booklet that includes 10 journal prompts with step by step instructions to create your own journal pages. It is 32 pages of full-color inspiration! Dreaming on the Page Journal Adventures include: Mixed Media Collage, Collage-a-Doodle, using ephemera, Journaling, the 10 minute collage slam, ghost facing, Caran d'Ache painting, Ink Jet Transfer and Pen & Oil Pastel Illustration. Also included is a "FUNdamentals of Play" chapter that explains tools and processes used in the booklet.

Are you ready for the adventure?

Available in PRINT or ELECTRONIC version at LuLu!

Namaste,

C H E Z

The Between

You Can Change The World, originally uploaded by oclark53.

"Maybe it's no accident that this story begins when we were slaves in Egypt. After all, what else could have persuaded us, a people as numerous as the stars in the sky, to leave all that we knew for the wilderness? Even after the old Pharaoh tried to kill our firstborns, even after a new one came who made our lives impossible by refusing to give us straw for our task of making bricks, we could not dream of leaving. Even though we grumbled every night about the cruelty of our masters, about our hard narrow life, we could not imagine anything different. What we knew was this: By the Nile there was life; in the wilderness was death.

It was, finally, the plagues that did it. Only after the waters of the Nile turned to blood and the stench of dying fish became so great, we could not drink the water; only after frogs swarmed into ovens and kneading bowls and beds, and lice followed the frogs, and swarms of insects followed the lice; only after pestilence killed the Egyptians' horses and asses and camels and cattle and sheep, and fine dust inflamed the skin of all those that remained; only after thunder, hail, and fire shattered the trees of the fields and ruin the crops and struck down all who were out in the open places; and in the end, most awful of all, only after the Angel of Death struck down every firstborn in the land of Egypt, except our own, from firstborn of the Pharaoh to the firstborn of the slave girl --- only then were we ready, finally, to leave.

God must have sent all those plagues as much for us as for the Pharaoh. To get our attention. To shake our heads loose from the bondage that made us stupid and kept us ignorant of what we could be. To make our hearts ache for something we were afraid to name. To make us hunger for our own land and for a new way of life. Maybe it took every one of the nine plagues and the terrible last one with its screams in the night to strike terror in our hearts for our own children.

Moses' men came around to our villages again and again and told us we were one people, not just twelve tribes - but most of us could not fathom what that meant. They kept saying "There is another place for us, a better way to be." We were afraid, but because of the children, we faced our fear. Even so, it was hard. Who can abandon everything without regret? Our homes. The soft mud of the Nile between our toes. Cucumbers and melons. Leeks and onions and garlic.

Knowing what to do and how to do it."

Rabbi Shefa Gold
Retold in "The Cultural Creatives - How 50 Million People Are Changing the World"


We are in a time of danger; a tipping point for our civilization and planet.

The masses are being denied basic rights, care and economic benefits, their sense of deprivation is fueling wars, revolutions and unrest.

The proliferation of nuclear, chemical, biological and improvised weapons continues to grow more threatening.

Overpopulation is taxing all resources.

Financial institutions trying to maintain their "have it all" status, resist change and are destroying the economy.

Ecological calamities arise daily, destroying our most precious foundations of life... our earth, our waters, our sky.

When will we wake up?

When will you wake up?

Around World War II, Harvard sociologist, Pitirim Sorokin, did an in depth study about major social change. He noted that highly uncertain times produce either a flowering, opening of civilization or a disintegration. Major transitional periods can be a Dark Ages or a Renaissance.

Crisis can invoke a response that is fresh, original and appropriate or it can paralyze and destroy us.

What is your response during the uncertain times we are negotiating?

Are you half in, half out? Are you playing wait and see? Are you fully engaged? Or are you pulling the curtains closed, sweeping your fears under the bed, and playing "Let's pretend everything is normal?"

There is no doubt about it.

We are in the Between.

And what a beautiful space it is!

To be in this state - the fertile openness, where everything is possible and connection is made.

The flow, the suchness, the full unwavering hereness.

It is here, in the Between, that the doorway, the "viriditas" as Hildegard of Birgen named it, opens and invites us into "the joyous, wet greenness of God's creative presence in the world."

Where whatever you love opens its secrets to you, where you can find connections between all things and create a new and whole picture.

Namaste,
C H E Z

Synchronicity is a Messenger

Synchronicity is a term originally created by Carl Jung to explain meaningful coincidences, unlikely conjunctions of events, surprising serendipity, and "winks from the cosmos".

When synchronicity happens for me, I get a very strong knowing, that I am on the right path, that I am in the flow and aligned.

So it has been the past couple of weeks.

Beautiful, simple events falling into my presence at just the moment I am thinking it to happen. It is hard not to feel like you are in good graces with the divine when synchronicity happens. It is such a miraculous moment.

We have all had this special magic touch us at times. What is amazing to me is the frequency at which it has been happening in my life.

I have been trying to figure out what the trigger was for the current rain of miracles... which by going into my numb-skull brain probably moves me right out of flow... but I want to "figure it out" so I can keep it coming.

I was contemplating this HUGE idea at 3 o'clock in the morning while making my hour long drive home from work. 

The only trigger that I can figure was that moment I let go of attachment was the moment the flow began to happen. I just let go. It wasn't a "fuck it", apathetic, letting go. It was more a "God's Will be done" or "inshaAllah" or "eh, whatever will be will be", let's see where it goes from here. I stopped trying to swim through a river "my direction" and began floating with the river the direction it was heading.

This obviously goes against my take & have it all under control nature. BIG TIME! It also goes against an unconscious belief that I have to WORK HARD to make things happen ~ The "I've got to knock on the doors and open them or they will never open" operating system I have slaved under my whole life.

So I am driving along, meditating upon this HUGE idea, when I remembered that Coast to Coast AM was on at this time and I could give my brain a rest and listen to some cool show about UFOs or Paranormal Activity.

I switched over to AM 1530 only to hear internal guidance system expert, Zen DeBrucke, discussing how the human body is naturally wired to physically connect with the divine, the many ways we recieve guidance and information, and how to tune in to it more efficiantly.

Really. 

I got a full body goosebump.

When synchronicity happens for me... it is an opening... a messenger telling me to pay attention, take the next step in that direction and trust that beautiful things are about to happen.

Namaste,

C H E Z