ORIGINAL BLISS

Follow Your Heart - OR DIE!!!!!

So I watched Oprah today.

I don't usually watch Oprah. I have nothing against her... I just don't like sappy, overdramatized, preachy things. I like authenticity. And although she preaches authenticity - it doesn't feel authentic to me.

I want REAL. Like, really really REAL.

I like my sunshine with some clouds...

my flowers in the dirt...

I like my tears... not to be a pretty, little well-up with one sliding down my cheek.... I like tears with snot and sobs and black, mascara eyes that leave a salty rind encrusted on my face.

But I watched Oprah today, featuring Tom Shadyac, the director of Ace Ventura, Bruce Almighty, Nutty Professor, who gave up the so-f-ing-rich-and-successful life, for a REAL one.

It hooked me. It touched me. And it reminded me of several things about myself that I have let go to seed.

I haven't been living my purpose. I know my purpose. I yearn and crave to be fulfilling it. BUT I continuously put it aside and give my energy away to purposes that are not from my own heart. I get distracted and off-track.

Oprah said today.... "Each day we live not doing our heart's desire... we die a little."

That resonated with me. I know that little inkling of death. I feel it when I close my eyes at the end of a day that I have been completely out of touch with my soul's reason for being.

So I am putting a little Posty on my bathroom mirror that reads - "Follow Your Heart - OR DIE!"

Every morning... as I floss my gums... I will repeat it in my head and go into my day following my heart.

Namaste,

C H E Z

The Shannan Show - NOW PLAYING!

Does it ever feel like the Universe is playing games with you?

Or is it just me?

Sometimes I feel like I am living in a Cosmic Sit-Com and the Higher Power and all Its minions gather round to watch....

Boy, do I make them laugh!

It especially feels that way when I think I have it all laid out ~ I got myself a plan ~ I'm dedicated ~ I'm following through ~ I'm on a roll!

That must be boring and predictable - a real yawner.... so the Great Scriptwriter in the Sky writes in a shocker. The celestial order gasps in surprise and tunes in again tomorrow to see how the kooky, comic, protagonist handles it all.

"Just Married and Happily Ever After" doesn't keep the audience engaged for very long. Write in some major drama. "Husband Goes to Jail" - "Husband Loses Job" - "Family Loses House" - "Court Battles" - "Real Ex Wives of the Trailer Park" - "ADHD and PTSD" - "All That and a Bag of Rancid Ruffles!"

Way. More. Interesting.

When I am finished writing my current book.... oh yeah, the little divorce the Divine Mastermind wrote into the soap opera called My Life ain't stopping me.... I am going to write an autobiography.

You'll laugh.

You'll cry.

You'll get really pissed off.

And I'll win an Oscar just for being in the race.

Namaste,

C H E Z

Easy Way Out

Easy Way Out - Elliott Smith

 

 

You'll take advantage 'til you think you're being used.
'Cos without an enemy your anger gets confused.
I got stuck on a side you know I never chose.
But it's all about taking the easy way out for you, I suppose.

There's no escape for you except in someone else.
Although you've already disappeared within yourself.
The invisible man who's always changing clothes.
It's all about taking the easy way out for you, I suppose.

Well, I watch you making mistakes...
I wish you luck, I really do,
With the problem, with the puzzle,
Whatever's left of you.

I heard you found another audience to bore.
A creative thinker who imagined you were more.
A new body for you to push around and pose.

It's all about taking the easy way out for you, I suppose.
It's all about taking the easy way out for you,

I suppose.

 

Leave it to Elliott to sum it all up for me in a poetic package.

 

Endings are hard.

Real hard.

When I think of endings, the first thing that comes to my mind is the ending of a book.

The End.

And that's that.

Neat and complete.

But in non-fiction life, endings are always long, drawn out and painful ordeals.

Maybe it is because we torture ourselves so long in the holding on stage before we finally surrender to the letting go part.

I have been holding on for dear life... but the final string snapped. The ending would not be denied. I am in the 'letting go' now... and even though it is really heartbreaking and scary, there is a relief in it; a strangely, sweet relief.

The sun is setting. I watch it gracefully descend on the horizon. Soon, it will slip completely from view - the last golden drop will be swallowed by the sea.

I know there will be beginnings again... they are as sure as the sun rises. But I can rest in the peace of the night for a while and be just fine.

Namaste,

C H E Z